Kate's writing - Crystal Clear

Here is Kate's story called Crystal Clear. Can you give her some feedback? Try giving her two stars (things she has done well) and one wish (thing she can work on).

This story was once told that far away in a village called Rams vill there was a boy his name was jack.He was the new kid to the school so let's get to the main bet.Jack went in his new class and the lunch bell rang everyone went off he asked the teacher were to eat she said I will tack u to the cafeteria  so she did.She put him next to a boy called Billy”hi Jack said” and Billy replied” hi are u the new kid”he said “yes Billy “said ok .Jack said “can I be ur friend” Billy agreed and just then freed the school bully came past . Hay u yeah new kid come over here good luck Billy said in fear so jack went jack gasp to Billy is it safe just go Billy replied ok said jack feeling fritened as he tock his first step he shivered and he said yes freed said wate ur that guy that I . Just then I walk in freed I yelled don't be mean to the new kid freed said shore so I went up to the new boy hay are u all right  Jack ask Billy who is she he said wall people know her as the nicest girl at school so Jack said yes so I walk off as all the boys sterd! I went and sate at a an empty table all the boys keeped steering so I left the room and sate with the staff Billy and Jack went to look throw the window as the covasashon went on with the staff I said we have company Jack and Billy were scared as I ask them to join the staff so they went to join me  Jack ask why does Fred leason to you all the boys leason to me I said Billy asked why I said I don't no so I went out with Jack and Billy and I asked Fred to come he said ok I toke him outside I said Fred can u do me a faver anything he replied ok I said can u be the one to do the radish I was talk to cafeteria ladies and they need someone to tack there rabid he starting today so I will tall them todells so he went to the cafeteria and he had to were a rabish outfit .